For many years now I’ve worked alongside an amazing organization called Parenting Our Parents that gives the aging population and the ones who love and care for them a community to share advice along with weekly expert articles and Certified POP Family coaching that help those in this demographic.
When I was offered the chance to review the book:
“(I want to go to Lithuania, or)
HOW TO HAVE FUN WITH YOUR AGING PARENTS
A Step by Step Manual for Adults Who Love and Care for Older Adults “
I knew that this book would be a great asset to those who are looking for a way to connect with their aging parents.
Who Should Read This Book
You care for an elderly parent, relative or friend who is no longer able to care for themselves. They may be unhappy and depressed, harmful to themselves or others. You are looking to connect on a deeper more meaningful level with those you care for and help create more passion and fun in your everyday lives together.
10 Great Takeaways from the Book
- Discover the Four Dysfunctional Parent Types
- Stuck-in-a-rut: This is the old lady who only wants to get her hair done, watch soap operas, and play BINGO. Her adult son or daughter may believe she needs more excitement in her life.
- Self-isolating: A lot of older folks live alone. If most of their friends have died, the kids are grown and gone, they’re too frail to work, or even play the sports they always enjoyed, they may need to find new reasons for getting up in the morning. Some of these folks may suffer clinical depression and need serious medical attention.
- Dangerously Independent: This is the person who is very old, half-blind, deaf and lame, but still insists on doing everything by his/herself and won’t let anyone help.
- Unreasonably Demanding: This is the type of person where anything you do is never enough. This person hates feeling useless, so he/she yells, complains and seems annoyed with everything you do or try to do. Day after day you are frustrated.
- Let bygones be bygones – Moving on from the past and not holding grudges, accepting your parents for who they are and not trying to change them. Knowing that you can change their behaviors but you can change how you react to them.
- You may not have the same interest as your elderly parent but that doesn’t mean you can’t compromise. The Author knew her dad loved telling stories about his past, something that she found boring. In order to fulfill his entertainment needs as well as her own, she recorded his stories while getting out her paints and canvas. While he went on and on about his days as a pilot in WWII, she was able to fulfill her own passion for painting.
- Discover activities you can do with an elderly parent with Dementia or Alzheimer’s – These could include singing nursery rhymes or singing songs they grew up with.
- A compassionate lie or two may just keep your elderly loved one safe – Learning what to do in situations where the truth may actually put your loved one in harm’s way and being ok not always being completely honest in order to protect them.
- Don’t take things too personally – Your aging loved one may struggle remembering who you are and this reality can sometimes make you feel hurt or angry. Realize that this has nothing to do with you, but is caused by the illness in which they are suffering from.
- How the Drum Talk Game can help you understand each other – Learning this non-verbal communication game can help you understand each other’s communication styles and help improve communication with each other.
- Learn Simple Coping Tools – Discover and take stock of what tools are available to you to make caring for your loved more simple.
- Help elderly parents discover new passions
- Help elderly parents re-discover old passions
About the Author
Christina Britton Conroy, M.A., C.M.T., L.C.A.T.
As a Certified Music Therapist and Licensed Creative Arts Therapist for over 20 years, Christina has enriched the lives of adults, elders, their families, and caregivers. She has helped frustrated, unhappy individuals deal with physical and emotional loss caused by age-related diseases, accidents, and self-abuse. She is also the Founder and Executive Director of Music Gives Life. Most of her musical Show Stoppers, ages 60-101 with an average age of 84, never touched a musical instrument, or sang into a microphone before joining Christina’s program. NY1 – TV NEWS named them “NYers Of The Week.” (I Want To Go To Lithuania, or) How To Have Fun With Your Aging Parents, her step-by-step, hands-on manual for adults who love and care for older adults, will be available fall 2017 from Black Lyon Publishing. Christina lives in Greenwich Village, NYC with her husband, actor/illustrator Larry Conroy.
Where to Buy
My dad loves to talk about the good old days. He loves to go for a ride a look at all the places he has lived and how much the neighbors have changed. He tells the same stories but I just listen and ask questions. He likes stopping by kfc last time we went it was gone broke his heart He is 89 years old
Ha, we are the aging ones! When my parents were still living, my husband and I made sure to take them out for long rides or new adventures as it was more difficult for them to do this on there own.
Check on them daily, talk and spent time with them.
My parents think I dont need to worry about them yet my best friend and I just laugh about how are parents think they dont need us yet
take time to listen to them, even if it the SAME story over and over the details may change
at least call them daily if you can’t visit.